Baby faces and baby pink were never meant to be good friends – not even for Bagel Girls. The last time I was this blushed out, I was four with a bowl cut, and have smartly skirted around the confrontation since then by way of getting nude. Don’t get me wrong: I like girly girls. At a friend’s recent 21st (about time, Sophia), I was just about bouncing off the walls in a glorious haze of rosy icing sugar, cherry blossoms and Marie Antoinette lemonade – and not just for Instagram. I simply exhausted my lifetime quota of batting lashes and flirty A-lines before I’d even started kindergarten – any princessing after this point was involuntary and likely pointe shoe related.
On the other hand, I have also sustained an allergy to wearing suits. A blazer and trousers or shorts, certainly, but never in the same texture or pattern, and certainly not in the same colour. Granted, I’m sure this would change the minute I succumb to Stella McCartney co-ord price tags (flares be mine), but even then, I doubt it would be underscored by any form of shirting. What am I? Your father?* I’m bored just considering the hypothetical.
Unbutton all but one, pick a pastel (interchangeable between mint, baby blue, baby pink and diluted limoncello if you’re blonde and blue-eyed), restrict accessories to a chunky man watch, clunky man shoes, and nothing else, ditch your blue eyeshadow, and roll out of bed. Prepubescent shades of Spring outweigh tired classics – how many times have you heard “this is the ultimate white shirt that will get you a promotion”, and “this is the only pantsuit your future husband will remember”? Let me tell you: this is the look that will confuse women in the most admirable sense of the emotion, and intimidate boys, purely on the basis that your suit is pink, with Bermuda shorts that just cover the knee. And, though your boss might (not) be all too pleased with the absence of a bra, Alexander Wang is calling, and he wants his vibe back.
Indeed, while setting up the exhibition I’ve curated for Westfield Bondi Junction last night, Nadene and I had the choice of this same shorts suit in black.
But, it’s still Wednesday somewhere.
And so, we wear pink.